Just tried a new crazy combo for soup tonight. A mix between potato leek, creamy potato and French onion. It was amazing. I will add the recipe below, which is a bit of an amalgamation of a few different internet recipes plus my own fine tuning.

Leek Chowder

4 large leeks (sliced in  medallions including the darker green parts)
1 large yellow onion (sliced then quartered)
2-3 garlic cloves chopped
1 small red onion chopped
2-3 cloves garlic minced
2-3 bay leaves
2 boxes chicken broth
2 large gold potatoes sliced
1-2 carrots in 1/2 inch chunks
1/2 cup heavy whipping cream
Salt & Pepper to taste

Sauté Onions and leeks in soup pot until caramelizarían just begins. 20 mins on medium heat.

Add garlic and continue to cook 2/3 mins more.

Add everything but cream and bring to boil. Cover and turn to low.

Simmer 30  minutes or until potatoes are done.

Add cream and heat through, serve either as is or purée all or part in blender.

Add Salt & pepper and serve.

First Day Back

Well, it's Adam's first day back to work after he broke his foot. I have been running myself ragged trying to keep up with all the duties we shared and I feel exhausted. I think if it were just the regular duties, I could keep up, but add to that the special needs of his Mom and his own new set of needs that are connected to his present difficulties and the task of being Mrs. Adam is daunting at best and I am feeling far less than my best as of late. I am kicking myself for being angry about a friends comments on my own laziness and my reaction to their statements that Adam did the brunt of the work in our relationship. While I accepted that it could have been true before, I see now that it really was the case. I had the majority of household chores but what really made his load Javier was the full time working and the care for his mother. I cannot go to work for him, would that I could, to save him the difficulties he is having in mobility. He is scrapeing about on crutches with a compression bandage and a boot on his bum foot; trying not to put pressure on it. The man weights upwards of 450 pounds, he can barely get up from the ground if he falls, the idea that the brunt of his weight is going to sit on one side for the next six months is nothing if not scary. How much damage is he going to do to his hip in that time, his other foot? What happens if he falls again and then gets injured more severely? I perish the thought. Well, it is early and while my poor injured soul of a husband heads off to his daily grind, I intend on trying to get some sleep, which has been escaping me as of late.

A Poem About My Husband

You're my someone to eat cheese with, the moon of my heart, pickles to my ice cream, chunks to my barf, hot-sauce to my popcorn, diet to my coke, the other half to my orange, the funny in my jokes, skittles to my sweet tooth, gas for my tank, you're everything I should have dreamed of but my mind came up blank, you kiss me when I need it, you kiss me when I don't, there's no need to remind you to care about Boat, your grin is like a beacon, in a stormy sea, your arms are like a snuggy, gently enfolding me, your eyes are mine, they never stray, your voice it booms and whispers, but it's always ok, your care for me is present, any time of day and loving you is easy, like a child at play, this stupid wooden poem, could never come close, to the truth of loving you, that I know the most. 

My Personal Testimony from 2006 or so

I wrote this when I was applying to be a counselor for a Northwest Christian Youth Camp.

   This is me. I have been a churchgoer for as long as I
can remember. I can recall standing on the "old pews"
and jumping up and down to the tune of the old-school
hymns, which I know by heart. This does not secure me
a spot in heaven, I know, because my sister went to
church all her young life in to late adolescence and
she turned away and has yet to come back.
    All my young life I had two constants, Church and
school. The rest of my time was filled with unsure
feelings and thoughts. For as long as I can remember
my parents have fought, about everything, from my
weight, to deviled eggs, much to my chagrin. I have
always thought my mom to be the right one because she
took me to church and was my mother who I knew loved
me but happenings in my life have made me realize
that things are not always as they appear.
    Let me start at the beginning, I first remember
asking Jesus into my heart a long time ago, when I did
not even know the pastors name. I was standing in the
great room and they asked if there was anyone who
wanted to ask for forgiveness and accept Christ into
their heart. I raised my hand. This time was the first
of many, many times that I would dedicate and
re-dedicate my life to the Lord. 
    Through the years the Lord has helped me through many
troubling times but the thing I believe was the most
impacting for me was when the Lord gradually helped me
know myself. I look back on my life and reflect often.
I don't lament about it with a need to change the
past, but with a regret that I did not do enough about
the past, while it was the present. Mostly I wish I
could go back and stand up for myself. I can recall
many times I was taunted and teased that simply would
not happen now. I can also remember times when my
parents were fighting that I would sit in the middle
and try and solve their petty disagreements. Just
recently I realized why my tireless efforts had no
effect, I was reading the bible in the book of
proverbs, I have no clue which Chapter or verse, but
it went something like love covers all but I'm not
sure of the exact words, still the meaning is true. If
my parents had just loved one another enough to get
though their problems, my family would not be in the
state it is today. 
    Though in my life, my situation and surroundings
haves stayed much the same, God taught me to change
the way I deal with it all, that, I believe is my true
testimony. In finding whom God wanted me to be (I'm
not all there yet) I lost that sad, annoying and
afraid little girl and became a strong, empowered and
bold woman. I have truly grown up in the Lords care. 
    God has been good to me and the saying that, God will
never give you more than you can take, has been tested
and found true many times. I recall a time when all I
can remember doing is going to sleep crying at night
because I believed I was worthless. God helped me to
know that was simply a lie. I also remember times when
I would sit in my bed crying because my father called
me fat or obese or a whale. (I preface this with the
fact that I am kinda fat and he has told me so since
childhood.) I can recall being the butt of every ones
jokes and feeling so alone and hopeless that I wished
I was dead but God was there, always, to help my pick
up the pieces of my heart and the shards of my pride.
Through many heart to heart chats with God I have
learned that it is not about my weight but about my
ability to forgive and to love without limits. I
cannot tell you how many times I have relied upon
the sureness of God and his grace, mercy and love in
my life to help make it through. 
    To truly tell you my testimony would take much longer
than a few pages, it would take a lifetime and forever
to tell you the feelings, the emotions, and the
reality of God in my life. Through my long experience
with him I have grown to need and depend on him to
lead me to a place of safety in stormy times. I have
learned to rejoice in the small victories and to thank
God for everything, good and bad.
    I am not all that good a writing things down, I am
great at saying them though. I believe that I express
myself best with poetry and since I have met and
exceeded the one page requirement I shall now write a
poem for you so you can understand how I feel about
God, 

Next to Me

Far away and close
You stand
I know the feeling of your forgiveness
I seek your face

You come up next to me
You give me strength
I rise up and cannot fail

You 
watch out for me
You give me love

I feel you holding me
I know you are there

If I knock 
you open the door to me
You don?t turn me away

You are far away 
and right beside me
You are with me
Always

A poem on Getting Older

I Go Around

By C. Miller

Used to go around wearing only tank tops.

Now I go around wearing only tee shirts.

Used to go around to the mall and the movies.

Now I go around to the living room couch.

Used to go around to all my friends houses.

Now I go around my own.

Used to go around making pasta for my homies.

Now I go around making dinner for my man.

Used to go around on the bus or I'm walking.

Now I go around in my own grey car.

Used to go around with my mom to buy groceries.

Now I go around buying groceries on my own.

Used to go around school, study hard, play harder.

Now I go around teaching what I used to learn.

Used to go around, watch them playing.

Now I go around playing for myself. 

Used to go around, young, naive, lonely.

Now I go around, older, and content.

Used go around, thinking time was an ocean.

Now I go around, thinking time's all but spent.

Used to go around wishing I were a bit older, a bit farther, a bit closer to complete.

Now I go around, reminiscing about missing all the little things that make living obsolete. 

Used to go around, be afraid of the end.

Now I go around with joy on the mend. 

The older that you get, 

the more it matters most, 

That days are for living

 not chasing some ghost. 

A poem about the Cares of this World

Weights in my pockets, wings on my feet, I'ma fly

By: C. Miller

Sometimes my lanyard hangs

like a 10 pound chain 

weighing me down 

Sometimes my eyes 

burn 

my heart 

hurts 

and I feel lost.

Sometimes my eyes see things 

they don't want to see

My ears her things 

they don't want to hear
My mind knows things

it doesn't want to know

Sometimes life seems meaningless
Sometimes it makes complete sense


Whenever I think of it, it just depends

My perspective is elective depending on what road I'm on.

My brains collective of knowledge eclectic makes the most of being alone

Dreams may come and time stand still

But my mind it never will

Free falling down to the extreme

Please come down and break the dream

A poem written when I was first married

A poem titled: Yin-Yang Lava Rock

You're so warm
You're so tall
You're so special
Through it all

Eyes like springtime
Heart my twin
Oh so glad, you're my yin.

Fuzzy haired
Free of cares
Teddy bear
Always there

We're Vulcans
With our melded minds.

A more awesome pair,
You'll never find.
As we sit back, reclined

Our arms ever intertwined.

We're making something
We're taking it too

We're being bound,
Stuck like glue,

Like epoxy and let's face it man, we rock, we cannot help it,
who's to blame, what we got, it's insane in the membrane.